Further Frivolous Commentary on Pink Roller Skates

Another fresh-meat girl has pink roller skates, too. I noticed this during her first practice while I was skating backwards. I was so entranced that I almost ran into someone behind me. Her wheels are the color of raspberry sorbet. Delicious roller skate wheels, nom nom nom…

HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS PINK?!

This house in San Francisco is pink!

The laces and the wheels on these roller skates are pink too!

So are these high top Converse!

They may have been pinker at an earlier point in their shoe-lives.

As are these strange pickles occupying my avocado wrap!

And these flower petals that are having a dramatic moment in the sunset!

AND! AND! AND!

The cupcakes on the front of this play-microwave!

Because it’s PINK! (Mount Shasta Edition)

Mount Shasta has plenty of pink things!

Like this Play Doh that was left outside and obliterated by all kinds of weather!

And this Play Doh that wasn’t left outside!

And rose quartz!

It opens your crown chakra, I hear.

And this fairy that Sophia says looks like Courtney Love!

And this Yo Gabba Gabba! figurine!

Toddler and pink-shirted mother not included.

Bubby (Luke-Andre)

Luke-Andre is skilled in fetching pink objects.

Wherein I Ask Myself if I Like Pretty in Pink

Way the fuck back in the day, the definition of comedy was that people got married in the end. I’m getting the feeling that a similar assumption about specific story elements happens in a certain sub-genre among high school movies where prom is the big (or a big) destination in the plot, either towards the end or at the very end. It’s what goes down in G.B.F. and Never Been Kissed*; the BtVS season 3 episode “Homecoming” had a strong prom-com vibe even though that was homecoming and not prom. Therefore, since prom-coms (if you will) let you know within, like, the first five minutes that their plot arc will deliver the viewer to this school dance setting, I don’t think I’m spoiling anything in saying that the 1986 film Pretty In Pink (click on the photo for IMDB link) culminates with its main characters at the prom. However, spoilers will creep into the paragraphs that follow, so consider this your alert. Then again, spoilers spoil for those who haven’t seen the movie, and some of the things I say here might only make sense if you have seen the movie. Whoops.

Watching Pretty in Pink prompted me to revisit the appreciation I have for the cars in another prom-com, 10 Things I Hate About You. The teenagers’ cars in 10 Things are second hand and not glamorous. I don’t see a justification for the car Andie (Pretty in Pink’s #1-gal) drives if the viewers are to believe she doesn’t have a lot of money – even if it does have dents in it, it looked like a nice car to me, and not just because it was pink.

I weirdly appreciate Andie going back to Blane in the end. I say “weirdly” not because he’s so dreamy or whatever but because Blane going back on taking Andie to the prom was an asshole thing to do. However, going back to Blane in spite of this makes it less simple in a way, and it’s a way that I can appreciate.

I also like that Andie and Duckie never got together. I don’t think it’s a mistake that Andie confronts Duckie about his stuckness at one point in the movie, then confronts her father about his stuckness at another point in the movie. Andie’s father and Duckie have too much in common with being stuck for Andie to be on the same plane as them, really. Andie is not stuck, and the symbology of stuck is laid down too explicitly with Andie’s father and Duckie for Andie to be with Duckie and for it to be satisfying to the viewer me. It wouldn’t have felt right. I think Duckie did some changing, too, so I’m not entirely sure that Duckie would still be an option for Andie if Andie wanted Duckie by the time prom happened.

I can appreciate and respect this part of Pretty in Pink, like I can appreciate and respect a lot of parts of Pretty in Pink: some of the minor characters were great, like the shoplifting kid at the record store Trax who Ione shoots with a staple gun. But do I like Pretty in Pink? If I were to get all superficial and limp-wristed about it, I’d say yes, because the cover’s pink and “pink” is in the title, and I would therefore want a copy to stick on my bookshelf with my other DVDs. But really, as far as a more rational personal preference is concerned, the film is okay, the Psychedelic Furs song that the title’s based off of is alright, and Duckie is hilarious, even if I wouldn’t want to date him either. I can think of several prom-coms I like better, like the aforementioned 10 Things, and Carrie …maybe not Carrie because, despite the prom-aspect, it is, by definition, so extremely not a comedy. Not unlike how The Virgin Suicides is not a comedy, even though their prom is the site of a significant plot point (albeit not at the end of the film/novel).

Speaking of superficiality: Ione’s prom dress was a lot cuter before Andie massacred it.

On a final note, I can relate to the following gif:

* And Grease, and Saved!, and Mean Girls. If you can think of more, you’re more than welcome to leave a comment.

Why Pink Materialism

Maybe you read the sub-title for this blog and thought, “Why pink materialism?” The reasons are three-fold:

1. The pink part: I know pink hasn’t always been associated with girliness, but, ya know, it’s been associated long enough for the popular assumption to be that it’s a chick color. Therefore, being someone who has TOTALLY bought into traditional gender roles, I declare: pink pink pink pink pink. I’ve bought into traditional gender roles so much that I’ve set my sights on a traditional and archaic role for women: a housewife!* (wtf else am I going to do with a bachelor’s degree in English literature?) I’m qualified, mind you: I can bake! I can pick up the kids from hockey/rugby/curling/whatever practice! I can clean the house in heels for FORTY SOLID MINUTES before my feet start hurting and I have to take them off! (I’ve been practicing! I’ll get better!)

2. The materialism part: I’ve been swilling the pink champagne of capitalist values as if it were bottomless – spoiler alert: it’s not. In this instance, when I say “capitalist values” I mean investing my identity in something as superficial as The Color Pink For Pink’s Sake and deciding that what that means is to buy a lot of pink stuff. Are you following?
Furthermore, focusing the core of my personal identity in this venue is much easier than having strong moral integrity or whatever.

Oh, and:

3. Pink is pretty.


* All sarcasm aside, I do recognize the role of the house-spouse as a valid lifestyle choice. I realize that post-disclaimer makes me sound like no less of an asshole.

Because it’s PINK!

OM[gosh], u GuYz! I painted my nails yesterday!

WHY did I deem this SO urgently important that I had to plaster it all over the blogosphere?!

SO urgent that absolutely NO fucks were given about the imperfections?!

BECAUSE THEY’RE PINK! (and black, but whatevs)

Pink like these sushi socks!

And this pickled ginger that’s been expired now for nearly a year!

And this doughnut box!

And my evil twin’s tent!

And Gwen Stefani’s hair circa Return of Saturn!

 

So, yeah, things that are pink... What’s you’re favorite? Pigs? Flamingos? Cotton candy? Hit me up, gurrrl! (Or boy.)

Rose Gardens

Sometimes our cupcakes don’t turn out like we had hoped. Which is okay: no rose gardens were promised. Which is also okay, because sometimes people get murdered in them.